Just when you thought the Snuggie Mania was beginning to subside, this happens:

There is no cure for Snuggie Envy. All you can do to preserve your furniture is to open the windows. Your friends, however, are without cure or hope. They will eventually all be sucked into the Vortex of Ultra-Cool, which is the Snuggie.

Note: ‘Proximal’ means nearby, or close. You’re welcome.

This just in. Snuggie Figure Skating has been made an Olympic Sport. Alicia, pictured below, is rejoicing at the news. “I used to Figure Skate in a blanket. Disaster. Not until I found the Snuggie did I find my true calling. I would like to thank Dorothy Hamill, the Snuggie, and of course the Olympic Committee. Vancouver, here I come!”