Doh! There’s a deep recession going on, with no end in sight. But there is a light gleaming as a bastion of hope at the end of the tunnel. Said light which gleams is the Snuggie Complimentary Booklight.

The Snuggie commercial so eloquently reminds us that wearing the Snuggie helps lower your heating bills. What goes unmentioned is that you can lower your electric bill by illuminating your home with the Complimentary Booklight. Travis has found that he can light a 400 square foot room with a single booklight. Travis is a textbook example of the 21st Century Snuggie Survivalist. He has everything he needs: Snuggie, Water, Shelter, and Booklight.

Deejay and Janelle cozy up to a good book in their Snuggies. Their complimentary booklight make the words pop off the page. “Syphilis a synopsis” is a real page-turner even without the complimentary booklight. Not to give away the book’s ending, but it doesn’t end well.

It was a festive time at the Park Ridge Cul-de-Sac as Sarah and Brittany, a.k.a. “Snuggie Deliverance”, entertained the neighbors and a handful of Fed-Ex and UPS drivers delivering last minute gift packages on Christmas Eve. This girl group chose to stick with a Snuggie theme, highlighting only a handful of the cornucopa of benefits befitting the Snuggie. Their three song set included:

Song 1: “Pyromania” by Def Leppard
Song 2: “Greensleeves” (originally entitled “A New Northern Dittye of the Lady Greene Sleeves” – circa 1580) (Editor’s Note: This was an especially bold choice, considering they wore Blue Snuggies).
Song 3: “It’s Getting Hot in Herre” by Nelly

Sarah strummed her Banjo while Brittany provided interpretive dance. The set was such a success that several concert-goers waved their complimentary booklights overhead.

Ethel Bumbridge, who lives across the street and previously had not left her home since Reagan’s first term, joined the crowd as the final notes were played. Faintly over the hushed gathering, with tears in her eyes, she exclaimed, “You can’t do that in a blanket…God bless us. Everyone.”