Archive for the ‘Snuggie in Public’ tag
The First Snuggie Pub Crawl – Cincinnati, Ohio – January 30, 2009
UPDATE: 3/20/09 – The Original Snuggie Pub Crawlers from Cincinnati now have an Official Website – Go to SnuggieShuffle.com to see the latest news related to these Snuggie Visionaries.
OLD UPDATE from 2/24/09 – Check out the ‘Cincinnati Six’ on our new site, SnuggiePubCrawls.com. Here is the announcement from earlier today. These guys are finally going to get the credit they’re due.
It is a date that will go down in history. Six men made one small step for themselves…
…but one giant leap for the Snuggie Nation. We now have the official date of the First Snuggie Pub Crawl.
Great Moments in Snuggie History - January 30, 2009 - Cincinnati, Ohio
On this historic night, these 6 Snuggie Pioneers bundled up in their Snuggies, braving the elements.
A bout of Complimentary Booklight Brawl broke out in the parking lot. Both participants were protected by their Snuggies and the match ended in a draw...of course. Peace descended upon the streets of Cincinnati and all was well in most of Ohio that night...nudging Cleveland.
This night proved historic in many ways. Not only was it the first Snuggie Pub Crawl and the first Snuggie Fight, the first symptoms of Snuggie Restless Arm Syndrome arose.
Heath menacing pub patrons in his Snuggie.
Look for their website, coming soon. You have been warned. These guys are going to be huge.
Snuggie Bowling League – Where Every Game is Perfect
You cannot go bowling in a blanket. And the Snuggie goes well with the always fashionable pair of bowling shoes. The Snuggie Bowling League (SBL) has sprung forth onto the scene.
Julie cannot help but laugh at her gutterless future, all thanks to the mighty Snuggie.
Julie's boyfriend, Kevin. Kevin lines up his shot at Riverlanes in Tulsa, while the Great Unwashed (i.e. those losers, sans Snuggies) look on in full Snuggie Envy.
‘We want to avoid any Steroid scandals. The SBL will be a clean sport. Since we never roll a gutter, thanks to our Snuggies, there will doubters. I hear the whispers all the time. ‘Whisper whisper whisper. That cool girl in the Snuggie has to be juicing’. It is sad that the world cannot embrace the fact that the Snuggie can turn anyone into the next Earl Anthony. So that is why we require the urine samples before each frame. Not each tournament, but each frame. To silence the whispers. It is a small price to pay…It was juicing that killed the Slanket Bowling League. Those poor Slanket people.’
The SBL urine testing is the most rigorous of any major league sport.
Kevin and Julie, after yet another 300-300 tie.
Snuggie Math: The Snuggie > Steroids
HEADLINE TRANSLATION FOR THE UNINITIATED: ‘The Snuggie is Greater than Steroids’ … (you’re welcome)
When Monica read about getting 10% off for Snuggie Wearers @ the gym (because the Snuggie reduces Phantom Sweat off of exercise equipment, which leads to reduced labor cost…of course), she was all in.
Monica lifting the maximum in her Snuggie. If she were wearing a blanket, the back of it would rip in two, from the magnitude of her Snuggie lifting power.
By day, Monica is a mild-mannered college student. But at night, when she dons the Security Blanket of the 21st Century, the Snuggie, her strength goes through the roof. It has been documented somewhere, by a realiable anonymous source, that the Snuggie is more effective than Steroids in hitting long homeruns. Seven major league teams have already changed their home uniforms to Snuggie versions. Take that, Slanket!
And of course, there are other benefits to wearing a Snuggie. When one wears the Snuggie, the rules do not apply to you. Exhibit A:
Monica can litter in her Snuggie.
You can get away with littering in a Snuggie. Everyone is so distracted by the sheer awesomeness of the Snuggie, that you can pretty much do what you want. Speaking of doing what you want, Monica wants to do the Heisman. Do the Heisman, Monica!
To all the Snuggie-Haters, talk to my Snuggie Heisman Hand
The Snuggie gives you supernatural balance, as pictured above. And did we mention that it also gives you a free pass when it comes to littering?
Tada. I'm afflicted with the Snuggie Restless Arm Syndrome and I'm a Happy Little Litter Bug.